Wow there's a lot to say

I know its been an insanely long time since I've blogged and really I have no excuse. Instead of trying to update you on all the insane progress Wear recycle has made, I'm going to update you on what will be happening.

Right now I'm living in Las Vegas. I moved into a house that will be going into foreclosure. I was offered the opportunity to stay in the house rent free until eviction occurs. My room mate is Amos Martinez. He is a chemical genius and is perfect to help with making the large 48"x60" prints for the Wear Recycle exhibition. That is the main goal while I'm here, has the printing of those photographs complete.

I'm trying to book the show at the Brett Wesley Gallery here in Las Vegas. Its a fantastic gallery that just feels right. I've met with Victoria, the curator so far, and will be showing Brett the sculptures hopefully soon. Cross your fingers that this show will be booked at Brett Wesley for some time next year.

The development for the paper: Amos and I have been testing adding acrylic to the paper to see if that makes it water proof and ready for the liquid emulsion and photo development chemicals. there has been some success in the acrylic. One of the problems that has occurred with the acrylic is that it sticks to the screen. In order to solve this problem I have decided to make the frames that will be presented in the exhibition so that when the paper is made it does not need to go through the process of being released from the screen. Having the frames stay with the paper creates strength and support for the paper during transportation and printing. The acrylic is definitely going to work for the water proofing. Right now I'm trying to decide what size wood I want the frames to be. I hadn't really considered what the final presentation was going to be so now I'm sitting on that decision. I also am not sure if I'm going to buy the wood or use salvage wood. Both are tempting for different reasons.

I am also working on smaller 2d Recycle Paper artworks so that I can have them for sale right now and sell them now. Rich Castro had been funding Wear Recycle over the past two years, but as of Aug 18th, I am responsible for funding it myself. It has been extremely difficult but my phone has not been shut off, I have been able to eat (sometimes only rice and beans), and I have not gotten stuck any where. I def have had to stress about the money, but some things keeps coming along right as I'm completely out of money. I've been lucky and I hope this luck continues.

San Francisco is the next location and I'm currently planning on making it there in mid Jan. I would like to have The Wear Recycle Poster Show; second series there in the Spring. At this time I already would like the large scale prints completed and ready for the exhibition and will be focusing on networking and understanding the Oakland and San Francisco art and music scenes while making the new work for the new Wear Recycle Poster Show.

As for the concept building. I'm still paying attention but I've become very private compared to months ago. I'm even kind of dating this guy and have not been really willing to share much info. I think its a reaction to how open I was earlier this year. Its likely this continues with my very bi-polar behavior and that in the future I will be emotionally stable enough to document my reactions again. The thought makes me cringe right now. I would love it if someone else would be willing to document there reactions. That would be amazing.

Wear Recycle is in the process of rewriting everything. We will be linking up with NARSAD for the "Sponsor a Researcher" program they offer. This will allow us to find a researcher that is studying childhood scripting. Ten percent of proceeds from the Wear Recycle exhibition will be going to the "Sponsor a Researcher" and we have a goal to raise $60,000 (check price) in the US exhibition to sponsor a beginning researcher.

There have been a few ongoing struggles during this Wear Recycle journey other than money. The two that have been most prevalent recently has been stabilizing myself during the instability of constantly in motion, moving, and not having a steady place to call home, and loneliness. Last week when after three weeks I had still not settled in my new location I became angry and experienced moments of strong anxiety in which I felt I was wasting my life. Now that I can work and the problem of getting settled is over, I realized how lonely it is traveling and never knowing when I'm going to leave. I haven't allowed myself (or can't afford) to rent out collaborative gallery space so I feel separated. I always have been very active and it sucks that I can't be, or haven't allowed myself to. I think this will be better when I have money to rent space even if I'll only be in a location for a short period. When it comes to people, because I'm not in anyone's routine I sometimes go days without anyone calling me. And why would anyone take me seriously in a dating situation. I'm just the girl that will leave. They expect me to break their hearts but really its usually the other way around. The loneliness in general has been really tough.

Ok now. I have to leave. That's the update. I don't have time to proofread right now so I hope its understandable. Don't know when I'll have wireless again. Thanks for following.